Elizabeth Kathleen Haher
25 May 1986 ~ 30 December 1999
Elizabeth was not planned, but when she arrived I could not
have been more happy.
No one knew that I was expecting until I was nearly 6 months along.
That's when my Mum asked me and I said, "Yes," as by then
I knew that I had to tell her Dad. But he was great about it and
was so happy when she was born.
We got married on the 10th of May 1986, thinking
we had until the 6th of June before she arrived, but
Elizabeth had other ideas and arrived 3 weeks early.
This was a good job as if she had gone the full time
she would have been more likely over 9 lbs; as it was,
she weighed 7 lbs 15 oz.
She was a baby who did not need a lot of sleep during the day
or night, but she was a good baby. She was very bright
and she walked at 9 months. When we went to get
her first pair of shoes, the lady in the shop
thought I was mad asking for shoes. I had to show her that
Elizabeth was walking.
One of the things that sticks in my mind from that time
is her first word, which was not "Mum" or "Dad,"
but my younger brother's name.
He came to see her when she was a few hours old. She had her eyes closed,
but as he looked over into her cot, she opened her eyes
and the bond between them was formed.
Even today that bond is still as strong.
She spoke her first words at my Mum's house.
She was at the bottom of the stairs and she looked up and
called out, "Mark!" My Mum said to me,
"Did you hear what she just said?!" I said, "Yes,"
and I knew from that day they would always be close.
There was no doubt he was going to be her Godfather.
When she was 2 1/2 years old, we had her brother,
and she was so pleased to be a big sister.
They were very close.
She loved school and the friends she made there, although,
sadly, she was bullied because of her epilepsy.
I found out she had epilepsy after she had twice
walked out into the road in front of a car!
This scared me to death, but once we knew
what was wrong, we dealt with it.
I let her do most things, although I watched her.
I let her ride her bike with her brother and go to the park.
When she was 11, we moved from where we were living to Colchester,
which turned out to be the best move for her in terms of school.
However, she was so scared about moving and not knowing anyone.
When we went to look at the school, on the way there
she had a number of seizures. If I had been aware
that it could have been dangerous, I think I would had panicked big time,
but once we got to the school and met the head teacher,
Elizabeth became relaxed. And when we got out,
my Mum could believe how happy she seemed.
The first day arrived for her to go, and I went with her.
On the bus she saw another girl with the same uniform
and said she was going to the same school.
She asked if she could go and sit with her. I said "Yes,"
and so she made her first friend. To this day
she is still Elizabeth's friend. I have seen her a few times,
and she always asks how we are doing and says
that she still thinks about her a lot.
She soon made a number of other friends who still,
when they see me, always say they think about her,
which means a lot to her Dad and me.
I was lucky; I went and worked at her school at lunchtime
in July 1999, so I spent a few months seeing her
at school and seeing her friends.
That brings me to near the time Elizabeth got her angel wings.
Just before Christmas of 1999, Elizabeth asked me if it
would be OK if this Christmas time she and Christopher
put their money together to buy my present for Christmas,
as she had seen something she liked. I said yes,
of course, that they could and could do the same thing
for their Dad. So they did. For their Dad they bought a tool box
and hid inside of it a box of chocolates. As for me, they bought me
a necklace which said, "Special Mum," and to this day
it is hardly ever off my neck.
On the 29th of December 1999, Elizabeth had been invited to a
friend's house and on the same night to a friend's sleep-over.
We said, "How are you going to do both?"
"You have to choose one or the other,
but she said she would go to her one friend first,
then on to her other friend's house, which she did do.
On the 30th of December 1999, I got up and had a horrible
feeling in my stomach, thinking something bad had happened to her.
Then around 3.30 pm, I saw her turning into our road. Was I happy!
I asked how her day had been with her friends and who
was at the sleepover--the boys? She said, "The normal crowd."
She then said she was going to listen to her music.
I said, "OK," and I went back and watched her brother
on his computer game.
While he was on that, she said she was going for a bath,
which I thought nothing of. Her brother and I
were downstairs watching a Western on TV.
To this day I can not watch it or say its name.
It was near the end of the film when her brother said,
"Elizabeth is calling for you." I said, "No, she's not"
He said, "She is." I said, "I will go when the film is finished,"
although i know how it finished. He said again,
"She is calling for you," so with that, I said, "OK,"
"I will go and see."
I can still see what I walked into as if it had just happened.
She was submerged in the bath, which was full; the taps were off.
At first I thought she was playing; then it hit me
like a ton of bricks that she was not.
I tried to get her out of the bath; I pulled the plug out,
and shouted for my husband to get help.
Two of the peope living next door to us were nurses,
so they come running in and took over from us.
My husband also tried to do CBC. The ambulance come and
we were not allowed to travel with her, which hurt me so much,
but I noticed that the bathroom floor had no water on it,
and to this day I feel that is so strange.
I will write on another page how I feel about the time
that has gone since Elizabeth became an angel and how
we found out about a very special support gruop here in the UK
that supports people who have lost a loved one to epilepsy
and how to find others online who have helped me slowly know
that I never be who I was before Elizabeth became an angel.
Sue Chris Haher, Elizabeth's Mum
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To view old guestbook, click HERE
Page Set-up and Some Graphics by Saralyn, Robbie's Mom
Lovingly Made for Elizabeth, Chris, and Richard
January 2010
© Sindy's Creations 2002-2007
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